And Then I Snapped
by KizzaKat
Summary: Edward left Bella shortly after her 18th Birthday, but when he returned it was too late. Charlie's dead, Bella's gone – or is she? 62 years later, a nomad arrives in Forks who goes by the name of Renesmee Smith. But who is she really, what is she hiding? And why does Edward find himself drawn to her so much? E&B. Rated T – Just to be on the safe side!
1. My Life So Far

**This is my first proper fan fiction, so reviews are much appreciated. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I have enjoyed writing it. Go easy on me!**

**I do not now, nor have I ever owned Twilight. All credit for that goes to Mrs. S Meyer.**

**Well all that's left to do now is read.**

* * *

I'm Bella Swan, Vampire _extraordinaire_, frozen at the age of 18 for 62 years.

I'm pretty sure you know my story. Well the gist of it.

Ya know. The whole basics; moved to forks to live with my dad, to make it easier for my mom so she could travel with Phil, met a gorgeous vampire, fell in love. Life couldn't be better. Until my eighteenth birthday. That's where things took a major downturn.

Jasper, (said vampires adopted vampire brother) accidently took a snap at me when I and my flawless stupidity, managed to cut myself on a FRICKING ENVELOPE!

Anyway…Edward freaked out and started blaming himself for constantly putting me in danger. But to be honest, danger has always managed to find me – I thought he knew me well enough to know this! So he decided enough was enough. And that I wasn't good enough for him anymore and he basically said I was boring. _I'm sorry mister, I am a lot of things but boring I ain't!_ Well…maybe a little. Okay a lot! But so what? I'm sure there are many girls who would just prefer to stay in and read her favourite book for the 100th time instead of going out and partying on a Friday night.

Well, that was the last time I saw Edward. And he was true to his word, that he promised that I would never see him again. But that didn't stop me from looking for him. For the first few years of my new vampire life I tried to search for the Cullen's but failed miserably. So I gave up. There was no point looking for someone who didn't want to be found! No matter how amazing they were. I thought that if he saw me as a vampire, he wouldn't be bored of me anymore or see me as a hindrance to him. _A girl can wish can't she?_

Once that plan when out of the window, I decided to pick myself up and get on with my life. And just hope that Edward was happy somewhere, even though it was without me. So I travelled for a bit; travelled to places that I had always wanted to visit. But even though I was immersed in such astounding cultures and sights, I always felt lonely; _He_ was always in the back of my mind. Distracting myself worked well enough to keep me busy, but it never removed the pain in my heart that has always been present since he left.

Of course I was not always without company – I travelled around with nomads for a time, but I always felt like the spare wheel. Some even tried to seek companionship with me in ways that were just _too_ _friendly_ for my liking. Edward would be the only person for me in that sense. Sometimes I try to tell myself _He's moved on Bella. Get over him and give someone else a chance._ But once you've had the real McCoy nothing is as good!

So now were at my current situation; I'm back in Forks. I know when I first arrived here, when I was human, I said that I hated it. But this little town grows on you. It's the only place I can truly call home. So every now and then I re-visit. I keep telling myself that I should really get a permanent home here, but it never felt like the right moment to, until now. For some reason, I just have a strange pull forcing me back; as if it is really important to do so.

Well only time will tell if it's fate or I truly am going insane!

* * *

**Well what did ya think? - Would love to hear, even if you didn't like it.**

**Until next time - K, x**


	2. Charlie

**Hey there, thank you so much for your support so far!**

**Sweetie7smiled**

**LaVonne Cullen**

**Thank you for my first, and hopefully not last, reviews! You made me smile so much!**

**Thanks also to those that Favourited and followed this story. You guys also make me smile so much - I'm sending love your way!**

**I still do not own Twilight.**

**And so I continue...**

* * *

**Previously...**

_So now were at my current situation; I'm back in Forks. I know when I first arrived here, when I was human, I said that I hated it. But this little town grows on you. It's the only place I can truly call home. So every now and then I re-visit. I keep telling myself that I should really get a permanent home here, but it never felt like the right moment to, until now. For some reason, I just have a strange pull forcing me back; as if it is really important to do so. _

_Well only time will tell if it's fate or I truly am going insane!_

**Chapter 2 - Charlie...**

When I arrived here, I did what I usually did when I came home; visit Charlie's grave. I frequently visit here and just tell him about my life and apologise to him about how I could not be a part of the last days of his life. When I think back to that time, it pains me to imaging what emotion I must have put him through with my mysterious 'disappearance'. He never really let me go. Always putting my picture in the paper and searching the area. I'd watch over him from a distance to keep him safe. But sometimes, no matter how quick you are, fate cruelly decides to take someone away from you. His heart attack was fast and fatal. I could have changed him into a vampire, but he wouldn't have wanted this life for me, never mind him.

So my poor father never got the explanation about my life he needed and so desperately searched for. He deserved to know, but what was I supposed to do? Just show up at his door and say _"Surprise dad! Yeah, my ex-boyfriend who left me was a vampire, and made another vampire vengeful, who got her own back by turning me into a vampire. Oh, but that was only because she wasn't successful in sucking my blood dry!" _Yeah! Tell that to my father and _that_ would sure give him a heart attack.

On the plus, at least he found Sue Clearwater before he died. You see, Sue's husband died, also of a heart attack, and along with my 'disappearance'...well let's just say losing the ones you love can turn out to be a real bonding experience.

_Here lies the dearly beloved  
Chief of Police, Charles Swan  
Treasured father,  
Loving Husband,  
Remembered Always  
R.I.P._

Simple and elegant. Straight to the point - like Charlie.

As I sit there alone, by Charlie's headstone, quiet in thought, I rearrange the wilted flowers surrounding his grave. _Honestly, with all the rain here in Fork's, you'd at least expect the flowers to grow well!_

I stand, disappointed with my flower arranging efforts, and dust off the soil from jeans. As I feel the moisture of the clouds descending, I look up to the sky and sigh. "Well Charlie, you always did say the rain was refreshing!"

Crouching down once more, I kiss my fingertips and touch his headstone, "Bye Charlie, Keep safe" _I love you._

Silently with my head bowed down, I stand once again.

Before I leave I take a cleansing breath.

Closing my eyes, relaxing whilst taking in the scents of my surroundings; the dew on the grass, the striking oak trees, and ... a vampire! _Oh crap! Not here, not now!_

I freeze, mid breath, my eyes snap open and suddenly I'm in my defence mode; my shield securely around me. I alter my appearance perception, so anyone who knows me won't be able to recognise me – A natural reflex now in the event of a surprise appearance of a vampire – _Which _really _comes in really handy!_

As I scan my graveyard surroundings, my eyes fixate on a familiar face of which I never thought I'd see again.

* * *

**Oh no! Who could it be?**

**I know this chapter is a little boring, but it's one of those sections you need to move the story along.**

**I hope I didn't disappoint you.**

**Please review. I'd love to hear your thoughts. I'm not a mind-reader like Edward.**

**Thanks for reading.**

**Until next time - K, x**


	3. My Surprise Visitor

**Thanks again for those who reviewed. You are amazing people who make me glow and brighten my day. Even after an annoying day at work where all of the inanimate objects seemed to be out to get me and play mind games with me.**

**That is also the reason as to why this post is late - when my school is on half-term, my boss loves taking advantage of that, which is great as it means more money, but bad as it results in instead of posting a new chapter, I pass out on the couch instead! - BOO!**

**As previously mentioned, I do not own Twilight! If I did I wouldn't have an irritating job and I would spend all of my days writing to spread Edward love!**

**Well then, now that my rant is over - I'll see ya at the bottom...**

* * *

**Previously...**

_Closing my eyes, relaxing whilst taking in the scents of my surroundings; the dew on the grass, the striking oak trees, and ... _a vampire! Oh crap! Not here, not now!

_I freeze, mid breath, my eyes snap open and suddenly I'm in my defence mode; my shield securely around me. I alter my appearance perception, so anyone who knows me won't be able to recognise me – A natural reflex now in the event of a surprise appearance of a vampire – _Which really comes in really handy!

_As I scan my graveyard surroundings, my eyes fixate on a familiar face of which I never thought I'd see again._

**Chapter 3 ****- My Surprise Visitor..**

_Esme Cullen_

_Why is she here in Forks? Are all of the family here? Is _he_ here?_

So many questions whizzing around my head demanding so many answers. Unable to respond, I stand there; astonished and stationary.

Her head snaps in my direction, for a fraction of a second worry crosses her face, but as she notices my golden coloured eyes, a soft smile forms on her face. And my heart warms at her trust shown by this simple action.

I'm frozen to the spot, unsure of what to do. I never thought I'd come across the Cullen's again. _Yeah sure, I'd thought about it and fantasised about our reunion – but in reality I was speechless. I wasn't prepared for this!_

She began to make her way over in my direction at human pace, careful not to scare me away or alarm any humans that may be lurking the vicinity, when suddenly realisation dawned on me – _She won't be able to recognise me!_ My internal subconscious debates whether this is a good thing or not.

By the time she reaches me, I've decided that it is a good thing. I shall play clueless and see how they take to me. After all they are the ones that left and abandoned _Bella Swan._

When she approached, I decide to allow her to speak first.

"Hello there dear, I'm Esme Cullen" She extends her right arm forwards and offers me a warm smile which makes her heart-shaped face glow. Her eyes are comforting and her familiarity makes me want to jump in her arms and give her a big hug. Her caramel coloured hair is styled in her signature gentle curls that cascade with elegance over her shoulders. Dressed with poise and dignity, she holds the silent-movie beauty as well as ever.

I smile back at her trusting nature and shake her hand in response. "I'm...Renesmee...Smith" _Yeah, Renesmee Smith, cos' that sounds normal – Who are you trying to kid Bella?_

"Renesmee Smith. What a beautiful name" she is polite enough to respond with.

"Thanks" I reply in a humorous tone, "It's a bit of a mouthful".

She laughs along with me, in a graceful bell-like manner. "Never the less; it is beautiful, like you".

"Thanks" I mutter quietly, looking down at the floor with embarrassment. Times like these are when I'm thankful that I'm not human and don't have my traitorous blush to give me away and embarrass me further.

"So Renesmee, do you live locally?" She enquired. When I didn't answer straight away her eyes widened with panic. "Forgive me for the intrusion; that was impolite. You do not have to answer me if you so wish".

_Bless her_. "No. It's OK Esme" I amended to put her at ease. "I actually have no place of residence yet, but I was hoping to stay in Forks for a while". _Seriously Bella? You're still gonna stay here and set yourself up for more heartache?_

Esme's eyes suddenly widened in glee, "Well of course, if you have no home yet, you shall stay with me and my family".

Now it was my turn for my eyes to widen, but in surprise; not at her generosity (which was immaculate as always), but at the mention of her family, _The Cullens_. "Y-Your f-f-family?" I stuttered.

* * *

**Be honest; who thought It'd be Esme? **

**I couldn't bring Edward in yet - It's too soon!**

**PLEASE review. I love hearing what you have to think. It also encourages me to write and update ASAP as then I actually know that people are liking what I am writing and in result decreasing world suck!**

**Until next time - K, x**


	4. A New Hope

**Firstly, allow me to apologise at how late this update is - What can I say except 'life get's in the way!' (And yes I do know that my excuse is totally pathetic). Anyhow...**

**Next, I would like to thank the two that reviewed and those that are now following the story and favourited. Kisses are being sent your way!**

**Thirdly, KizzaKat STILL doesn't own Twilight. - _Shock Horror - bet you never saw that coming!_**

**Now I shall hand over to Bella...**

* * *

**Previously...**

Bless her. "_No. It's OK Esme" I amended to put her at ease. "I actually have no place of residence yet, but I was hoping to stay in Forks for a while"._ Seriously Bella? You're still gonna stay here and set yourself up for more heartache?

_Esme's eyes suddenly widened in glee, "Well of course, if you have no home yet, you shall stay with me and my family"._

_Now it was my turn for my eyes to widen, but in surprise; not at her generosity (which was immaculate as always), but at the mention of her family, _The Cullens_. "Y-Your f-f-family?" I stuttered._

**Chapter 4**** - A New Hope...**_  
_

"Oh don't be frightened love. They shan't harm you" she assured.

_Of course they won't harm me physically, I know that. But what if they reject me again? That would surely mentally scar me - again!_

At my silence, she continued, "There are seven of us in total; my husband Carlisle, and my five children: Emmet, Rosalie, Alice, Jasper and Edward" she explained with pride clear in her eyes.

At the mention of Edwards name I winced.

_Only 7 still? That means that Edward still hasn't found another mate. I smiled internally at that - clearly enjoying the new found information a little too much. But maybe we could have a chance again..._

_But, how could I cope seeing _him_ again? Can I trust them again? _I knew the answer to that last question without a doubt. Of course I would. It's not like I can hold a grudge against someone for long.

A thought suddenly crossed my mind, "How can you trust me - you don't even know me!" I pondered out loud.

"I can see, from your eyes, with your vegetarian diet that you have no intention of harming us, or any human either." She simply stated with no reservation.

She had me there. I couldn't inflict harm on anyone intentionally. I never even killed a human as a newborn. For that I was very proud of myself - _and relieved!_

"I assure you also that my family and I are all 'vegetarians' as well, and do not take lightly to the intentional harm upon innocent humans" she said in a gently menacing tone. There was also an undertone of threat behind her words. _A bit hypocritical there __Esme__, especially after what you and your family__ did to me after you left!_

_Don't be sour Bella - that is in the past!_

I shook my head to clear my thoughts, "Of course not E-Esme. I would be delighted to stay with you and your family" _And Edward _"But I wouldn't want to put you out of your way"

The smile gracing her face widened with adoration, "Oh not at all dear, they shall be delighted to have a new face in the house"

I couldn't help but smile at her generosity. I also couldn't help what happened next... I sprang into her arms and gave her a bone crushing hug. _OMG Bella – What happened to being nonchalant? _She stiffened in surprise at first but then returned the hug when she realised what I was doing.

Esme chuckled lightly as she patted my back, "Hopefully you'll bring some joy into the house, we all need a little cheering up lately." She added sadly.

_Why? What had happened? Was someone hurt? _My internal monologue began to make me frustrated as I couldn't ask these questions without her being suspicious.

I stepped away from her to allow some space between us. Her face looked aggrieved and lost in thought.

"I'll try, but I can't promise anything" I shrugged.

At that, Esme's brows knitted together while she cocked her head to the side to study me further. "There's something familiar about you, but I just can't quite put my finger on it..." she trailed off.

I lowered my head down, staring intently at my shoes; allowing my curtain of hair to hide my expression of worry. "I guess I've just got one of those faces" My excuse was feeble, but it did the trick.

In fear that she was making me uncomfortable, Esme continued with our original topic, "Well, why don't I show you to our home, Renesmee. And get you settled in straight away. Unfortunately, my husband will not be home for another hour or so, as he works late at the local hospital. But I can introduce you to the rest of my family if you like."

"I would be honoured to meet them" _Again_ "But I wouldn't want them to think that I am trying to intrude into your family and into your home." I couldn't help my blubbering worries that were making themselves known without my permission.

A sympathetic smile made its way to Esme's face as she placed a caring hand on my shoulder, turning me slightly so I could walk with her comforting me. "Honestly, you worry too much dear. They shall be as glad to have you as I am. You will be a good distraction for us all." She mused ominously. Hope was clear in her voice, as if she thought that I was the solution to all of her problems. _Pressure much!_

"Distraction?" I pondered out loud. Why could they possibly need a distraction?

"Hmm, my family is in a _delicate_ condition at the moment, especially my son Edward. You'll have to be patient with him – he's not his full self at the moment." Esme's sadness in her tone was heart-crushing.

I would have tried to comfort her, but all I could think of at the moment was; _EDWARD, My Edward – What has happened to him? POOR EDWARD – WHY EDWARD?...Is he okay?_

* * *

**Now I hide behind my pillow and wait for your opinions, please.**

**I know - another borezilla chapter. For some reason when I am writing a story I start in the middle, then move onto the beginning and then give the story an ending. I don't know why I like to make things harder for myself. But I really just want to move on to the middle of the story, so if you ever think that the story is progressing too fast then that is why!**

**So _please_ review like I'm pretty sure you all want to. If not then I hope you are enjoying Bella's praggles so far.**

**Until next time - K, x**


	5. Smiles

**Happy remembrance day! (An hour ago)**

**I really don't want to be one of those people that make all of their authors notes apologies, but it's looking that way. My excuse is that my computer crashed with all of my work on it - Yey! So ****_that_**** had to be fixed. Then (cos I usually have my account already logged on) I forgot my password and what e-mail address I used here. Imbecile I know!**

**As per ushe - I do not own Twilight. I've spoken to my financial adviser about getting that changed but he says that cash flow is a bit of an issue for that situation at the moment. But I'll keep you posted!**

* * *

**Previously...**

_"Distraction?" I pondered out loud. Why could they possibly need a distraction?_

_"Hmm, my family is in a delicate condition at the moment, especially my son Edward. You'll have to be patient with him – he's not his full self at the moment." Esme's sadness in her tone was heart-crushing._

_I would have tried to comfort her, but all I could think of at the moment was; _EDWARD, My Edward – What has happened to him? POOR EDWARD – WHY EDWARD?...Is he okay?

**Chapter 5 - Smiles...**

By the time we reached the Cullen's house my panic was officially in overdrive, and Esme was beginning to notice.

"Are you okay love?" Esme asked sounding genuinely concerned. We had been making polite small talk on the way over, just general questions into my life, I gave simple answers but nothing too in-depth – _Didn't want to give the game away now did I!_

"Erm... Yeah – just not used so much attention. I'm quite a boring person actually and often travel mostly by myself" was my explanation. I avoided eye contact and looked straight ahead, hoping she's buy my excuse. _It wasn't a complete lie – just not the honest truth!_

"Oh..." Esme pondered, looking away from me sounding embarrassed, "Well, if I'm making you uncomfortable don't hesitate to tell me!"

Oh great! Now I've offended Esme. _Great job Bella - Back in her life for approximately an hour and a half and you've already upset one of the most altruistic being's you could ever meet!_

"Gosh Esme – Of course you're not making me uncomfortable. The complete opposite in fact. I haven't felt this at home for a long time" I amended. And it was true. I did feel completely at home, even if they didn't want me.

The smile that graced Esme's face was so heartfelt and unadulterated that I couldn't help but smile back.

* * *

**This is only short cos I am still having computer issues, but I felt that I needed to get _something _out there as it has been way too long since my last update!**

**I appreciate the reviews, (the ones from last time literally _(__obviously not - but the sentiment is there) _blew my mind!), but I understand and won't be offended if you don't due to the length of this 'chapter' - Seriously it's so short I shouldn't be even allowed to call it that!  
**

**Until next time - K, x**


	6. Reluctance

**Yesterday, me and my friend, were possibly the coolest people ever. I sat for almost 12 hours in the cinema watching all of the Twilight movies, then finally at midnight watched Breaking Dawn Part 2!**

**Personally, I think it was a really good film and the best Twilight movie. And that is coming from someone who believes the films disgrace the Twilight name. Although towards the end - I must admit - I almost had a heart attack! I won't prattle about this any longer as I don't want to give anything away! **

**If anyone is as cool as me, then review as I'd like to know what you think.**

**Anyway, my computer is still broke, with my chapters on it - URGHH! **

**As I thought it would be too much responsibility to own Twilight, I decided not to!**

* * *

**Previously...**

_"Gosh Esme – Of course you're not making me uncomfortable. The complete opposite in fact. I haven't felt this at home for a long time" I amended. And it was true. I did feel completely at home, even if they didn't want me._

_The smile that graced Esme's face was so heartfelt and unadulterated that I couldn't help but smile back._

**Chapter 6 - Reluctance...**

"This is my home," Esme stated proudly. "Well for now at least" she chuckled.

"It's beautiful" I remarked. The enchanting three-story house appeared daunting and intimidating.

I looked towards the beautiful grand house before me that was all too familiar. _It's not too late Bella, you could just run away now!_

"Well then," Esme began, noticing my hesitance to enter the house. "Let's not waste any more time. Come inside."

_Don't be a coward Bella! _I straightened up, pushed my shoulders back and raised my head. Preparing myself for what was to come. _I can do this! - I hope!_

Esme made her way inside and I followed her lead.

As I began to move towards the house my legs felt like lead; heavy and reluctant to move.

_Well it's now or never I suppose!_

* * *

**I promise that the next chapter will be longer! Hopefully!**

**Please review. I love you if you do!**

**Until next time - K, x**


	7. Four Beautiful Creatures

**Hello my lovelies. I promise you that I have not abandoned this story. Not while there is at least one person who still wants to read it, (thanks to you).**

**I apologise profusely for my lack of updates. I would love to promise you that I will be able to update on a regular scheduled basis, but all I can say is that I will try to do my best. When Yoda said "Do or do not - there is no try" he clearly did not consider situations like this!**

**Santa said that if I was a good girl and updated more frequently then he might consider talking to Stephenie Meyer about giving me the ownership of Edward and the Twilight Saga - But I'm not holding my breath!**

**Sorry for the wait, but here it is...**

* * *

**Previously...**

_Esme made her way inside and I followed her lead._

_As I began to move towards the house my legs felt like lead; heavy and reluctant to move._

Well it's now or never I suppose!

**Chapter 7 ****– Four Beautiful Creatures...**

The house was in its same elegant state as always. Just like it as sixty years ago.

The walls, the high-beamed ceiling, the wooden floors, and the thick carpets were still in the signature Cullen style of varying shades of white. The very bright, very open and very large open-planned room looked even more daunting than from when I was human. I could see my new appearance in the glass of the south facing wall, and my internal worries were very evidently making themselves known upon my flawless features. As I composed myself, I glared at the massive curving staircase that dominated the west side of the room as it seemed to mock me by keeping my surrogate family from me, hidden away on the upper floors.

As I made my way further into the house, it felt cold, like something was missing. The friendly, warm home I once knew no longer felt whole.

When Esme spoke, unaware of my distraction, she broke me out of my thoughts.

"Children, we've got a visitor", she spoke only a fraction louder than her conversational tone, but without a doubt they would be able to hear her wherever they were in the house.

In a matter of seconds Rosalie, Emmet, Jasper and Alice stood before me.

Jasper and Emmet stood defensively in front of their spouses, ready to attack if necessary.

"Jasper, Emmet – Stand down!" Esme ordered with a mild tone of irritation behind her voice. They were reluctant at first but complied by relaxing their postures a fraction. "This is Renesmee Smith." She introduced me with a comforting smile upon her face, for which I was thankful for. "She is new in town and intends to stay for a while, so she will be living with us until further notice". She continued to explain with finality clear in her words. _New in town – Ha! If only she knew._

I couldn't help but smile a fraction at the look of irritation, which was now blatantly obvious, etched upon Rosalie's perfect face.

"Renesmee," Esme now directed her voice towards me, "I would like to introduce you to Rosalie and her husband Emmet" Rosalie stayed perfectly motionless while Emmet gave me a slight wave, "and Jasper and his wife Alice", Jasper nodded slightly while Alice's expression became one mixed with confusion and glee.

I smiled back at them all and gave them a tentative wave. "Hi there..." I trailed off awkwardly, whilst all four of the beautiful creatures that I once called family just stared back at me.

I chuckled nervously, looking down at the floor attempting to ignore their scrutinising inspection of me. I scrubbed the back of my neck with my right hand searching for something to say to ease the tension. "I'm sorry for intruding so abruptly, I haven't really managed to get myself organised yet and Esme was gracious enough to offer to open her home to me..." I let my rambles trail off as my efforts to ease tension _clearly _were not working!

* * *

**...Awkward!**

**I know what your thinking - Where the F*** is our boy Edward?**

**Well, I guess you'll just have to read my next update to find out. If he can be bothered to appear in the chapter!**

**Now it's time for you to do one of your favorite pastimes - Review! **

**Merci beaucoup.**

**Until next time - K, x**


	8. Fortune Telling Pixie

**You are gonna hate me. I know that because I hate myself at the moment - you will know why at the end. You'll just have to forgive me. ****_Hey - at least this update is early, and that's the reason it is short._**

**I still do not own Twilight! OMG WTF guys!**

* * *

**Previously...**

_I smiled back at them all and gave them a tentative wave. "Hi there..." I trailed off awkwardly, whilst all four of the beautiful creatures that I once called family just stared back at me._

_I chuckled nervously, looking down at the floor attempting to ignore their scrutinising inspection of me. I scrubbed the back of my neck with my right hand searching for something to say to ease the tension. "I'm sorry for intruding so abruptly, I haven't really managed to get myself organised yet and Esme was gracious enough to offer to open her home to me..." I let my rambles trail off as my efforts to ease tension _clearly_ were not working!_

**Chapter 8 ****– Fortune Telling Pixie...**

Rosalie was the first to speak. "Alice said you would end up picking up a stray." She commented as if I was not there, "and now she's staying with us!" She continued with her previous illusion. "Great that's just what we need". Sarcasm was thickly laced in her voice.

"ROSALIE CULLEN" Esme gasped loudly. "Stop being so rude, she is our guest. _I _invited her to stay with us. End of discussion."

To that, Rosalie gave me one last death glare and stomped off towards the stairs to ascend them quickly.

When I turned my attention towards the others Emmet gave me an apologetic smile with a small shrug of his shoulders. "Don't worry about her; she is a bit... _hostile_ towards newcomers". _Well that was the understatement of the century._ But Emmet's attempt to comfort me with his words warmed my heart.

From higher in the house I heard a terrifying growl. "DON'T YOU DARE APOLOGISE TO _HER_ FOR ME!" Rosalie roared.

When I managed to tear my gaze away from the direction of her voice from the stairs, I was surprised to see the rest of the present Cullen's staring at me in anticipation.

I stared down at my shoes self-consciously to avoid making eye-contact. "Well I guess we won't be braiding each other's hair any time soon" I joked to ease the apprehension that was thickly lacing the room.

And it worked; Alice burst out laughing and instantly hugged me with no reservation. I tensed for a moment but then instantaneously embraced her back with as much emotion I could muster without giving the game away. From the corner of my eye I saw Jasper smile in contentment. When Alice pulled back, she chuckled and shook her head at me. "I don't know how yet – but you are going to great things here", Alice commented, the smile never faltering from her face.

Doubt was clear in my emotions and I could tell that jasper sensed that as my eyes flickered towards him for an instant and noticed him studying me with curiosity.

But then again, who am I to disagree with a fortune telling pixie.

* * *

**I know - No Mr. Perfect with us yet. Unleash the hate...**

**Soon - I swear!**

**Until next time - K, x**


	9. Where Was He

**Apologies my lovelies. Exams and revision have taken up most of my time. Thank you for all your support and reviews even when I have neglected this story for a long while.**

**I shall say no more...**

* * *

**Previously...**

_Doubt was clear in my emotions and I could tell that jasper sensed that as my eyes flickered towards him for an instant and noticed him studying me with curiosity._

_But then again, who am I to disagree with a fortune telling pixie._

**Chapter 9**** - Where Was He...**

I was shown around the house by Esme and Alice.

Alice seemed different as well. Still cheery and polite, but no longer her bouncing, excited energetic self. And that was worrying.

During the tour, I nodded at all of the appropriate times and answered their simple questions about my mundane life, feigning interest and trying to be polite. When all my mind was truly focused on was Edward and his absence. _Where was he? Why wasn't he here to show me around?_

We wondered along down each beautiful and extravagant hallway, not entering some rooms, such as their bedrooms, on my insistence that I didn't want to invade their privacy any more than I was already doing so.

They both immediately tried to reassure me that I wasn't and couldn't possibly do so but I was persistent in the fact that they had already allowed me to invade into their lives enough and to do anymore would be unforgivably rude of me.

I tried to distract myself from my worries about Edward by contributing to the conversation. "Esme, I must say that your home is absolutely charming."

Esme's smile was blinding as she answered me. "Thank you Renesmee. This house is my favourite of all that we own. It had a certain pull to it. Not to mention all of the great memories of Be-" She stopped short all of a sudden. Her eyes widened and shock possessed her features. She composed herself and started again, "Well, of happier times". Her masked smile on her face faltered again as she reminisced about the past.

Eventually we stopped outside a door at the end of the hallway on the same floor which also hosted Edward's room.

"This is now your room", Alice pointedly stated, signalling to the oak door in front of us.

"For however long you may want it" Esme interjected as she opened the door and led me through it with Alice flanking me.

It was perfect. Beautiful and elegant; just like the designer.

"So, what do you think?" Alice the curious pixie was staring at me intently gauging my reaction.

I was speechless as I stood there gaping like a gormless fish. My only coherent thought was that a scene like this belonged in a Jane Austen novel.

Esme suddenly became worried, mistaking my reaction for dislike. "O-of course, feel free to change anything if it is not to your liking" She stuttered.

As I shook my head, still exploring the room with my eyes, I said the only thing that made sense, "I wouldn't change a single thing." Awe was clearly the most prominent emotion in my voice.

Esme smiled and sighed; clearly relived. "Good. Great" She amended. "I'm so glad you like it!"

Alice agreed to this by nodding her head enthusiastically.

"Well, we will leave you now to settle in. Please make yourself at home, and feel free to explore a little more if you wish." Esme grabbed my hand and gave it an encouraging squeeze.

As she made her way to the door, I saw her subtly hinting to Alice to do the same and give me some privacy.

Alice danced towards me and kissed my cheek then turned to leave the room. "I'll be downstairs with Jaz if you need anything, or even if you don't" She added before she left.

"Thank you" I blurted out, desperately trying to express my gratitude. "I can't even begin to tell you how grateful I am for your kindness." I said, feeling really ashamed that I had nothing of consequence to offer them in return.

Esme walked over to me and caressed my cheek with her hand in a motherly gesture. "Think nothing of it my dear" her eyes penetrating into mine. "Don't be a stranger."

_Wait – Edward!_

"Oh Esme" I pestered before she managed to leave. I didn't want to occupy any more of her time but there was one thing that was relentlessly niggling in the back of my mind. _Edward._ She was looking at me curiously still waiting for me to continue.

_Now – How to be subtle about this..._

"I thought you said you had _five_ children" I pondered, hoping she would get to what I was wondering about.

* * *

**(Big sigh...) Yeah I know! I have no excuses other than he is on the horizon and it is just the way I planned the oncoming events to unfold in a certain way to why he is currently being kept from us.**

**Until next time - K, x**


	10. That Won't Take Long

**Britain + Snow = Complete Chaos! LOL!**

**I really, really, really, really, really, really, really should be revising. But writing was so much more tempting.**

* * *

**Previously...**

_"Oh Esme" I pestered before she managed to leave. I didn't want to occupy any more of her time but there was one thing that was relentlessly niggling in the back of my mind. Edward. She was looking at me curiously still waiting for me to continue._

Now – How to be subtle about this...

_"I thought you said you had _five _children" I pondered, hoping she would get to what I was wondering about._

**Chapter 10 -**** That Won't Take Long...**

Realisation dawned on her. She released a long breath, shaking her head. She lowered her voice as she came closer to me to explain.

"My other son, Edward, is going through a difficult period of time at the moment. It's a long story to do with heartache and longing, but not mine to tell. Like I said before – he's not himself at the moment. Not very sociable or..." she trailed off looking for the right word, "patient. He usually keeps to himself cooped up in his room and refuses to hunt-"

I interrupted her by gasping in shock.

"I'm sorry," I apologised for interrupting, "but isn't he terribly uncomfortable?" I queried. _How can he stand the pain? How could I cope seeing my Edward in pain?_

_He's not your Edward anymore Bella!_

"He must be" She continued to explain. "But he will never talk about it. He doesn't involve himself in family events. He refuses to keep up the human pretence by going to school. He's a ghost of himself these days Renesmee." Esme's eyes suddenly looked very old and depressed.

_What could have caused this?_

She straightened up and it was clear to see that she was trying to remove the disturbing thoughts from the forefront of her mind.

"So, what I'm saying is don't be offended if he shows a lack of interest for you."

At that I scoffed. "Please Esme, I'm not that delicate – or easily offended."

"Well then" she said with a cheery smile. "I'll leave you be to get settled".

"That won't take long. I've only got this" I explained as I held up my small cross the body duffle bag. It only held the bare necessities; my mobile, my card, a couple of books, a few odd items of clothing and a photo frame – my most prized possession. A photo frame containing a picture of me with the Cullen's on my eighteenth birthday. This was my lifeline for the last sixty-odd years, just believing that they were happy somewhere and that there was a small possibility that I could be re-untied with them one day - even if I could never be with Edward in the same way again.

"If you need clothes then please borrow from any one of us. I'm sure Alice will be up for a shopping trip sometime soon as well if you'd prefer new ones. Anyway, I will be downstairs. Don't hesitate to come and find me for anything at all. Feel free to explore. Our home is now your home too. Don't be uncomfortable."

As she made her way to the door I couldn't believe how lucky I was to have found them once again. My family – even if they didn't really know who I was, or used to be.

"Thank you, Esme" I said again for the zillionth time, but they were still as true as the first. I may be tiresome hearing me repeat my gratitude but I needed to express it any way I could.

"Oh hush dear, no more of that. You are and always will be welcome." She amended earnestly and with that she left.

I sighed contently as I laid myself back on the bed. Closing my eyes, I let my mind wonder.

Deep in thought and completely relaxed, I was brought out of my tranquility by a knock on the door.

I sat up abruptly and smoothed my hair and clothes. "Come in" I said hesitantly, not knowing what to expect from this conversation.

* * *

**BTW after next week I will be updating more frequently. I've got a lot on at the moment.**

**Question - Would you prefer longer chapters with less frequent updates or more frequent updates but the size of this chapter? _If you had to decide upon one!_**

**Thank you for your reviews. They are lovely and much appreciated - HINT HINT!  
**

**Until next time - K, x**


	11. Beautiful Untouched Serenity

**Booyaa! Shove this up your pipe and smoke it! **

**In celebration of possibly totally messing up on one of my exams I decided to give you the gift of a long-ish chapter!**

**Well, lets see if it is any good then...**

* * *

**Previously...**

_I sighed contently as I laid myself back on the bed. Closing my eyes, I let my mind wonder._

_Deep in thought and completely relaxed, I was brought out of my tranquility by a knock on the door._

_I sat up abruptly and smoothed my hair and clothes. "Come in" I said hesitantly, not knowing what to expect from this conversation._

**Chapter 11 -**** Beautiful Untouched Serenity...**

Muffled voices, that require my attention to listen to, are coming from the other side of the closed door.

"Go on" Emmet urges someone, by whose scent I can tell is Rosalie._ Rosalie – what does she want to speak to me for?_

"I'm going to look stupid!" Rosalie murmurs sounding embarrassed.

"You, my Rosie-Posie, could never look stupid. Now go! She's probably already listening to what we are saying." True, but with vampire hearing that is hardly a surprise.

The door suddenly opens and in comes Emmet dragging a nervous looking Rosalie behind him.

"Emmet, Rosalie – How unexpected your visit is" I say with mock surprise.

Emmet smirks at me with amusement, "Hey Renesmee. Rose wants to talk to you"

"Okay – Shoot." I offer trying to hide my actual surprise.

Shimmying out of the door Emmet adds "I'll give you girls some privacy". He nods at me and give Rosalie a pointed look. _Okay..._

Rosalie turns to me with a determined look on her face. "Alright – so here goes. Listen up carefully as I will not repeat myself and you should count yourself very lucky to be getting any form of apology at all. Okay?" she huffed out in a rush.

I nodded to show my understanding but she raised her eyebrows at me clearly wanting a verbal response. "Okay" I responded, trying to keep my patience in check. _At least she's trying._

She blew out an impatient breath, steadying herself for her next speech.

"I – Urghh!" She seemed to be struggling with her words, so I sat there tolerantly waiting for her to arrange her thoughts.

"I'm sorry about the way I reacted earlier. It's just that last time we let a stranger into our lives the outcome was not the best. Basically – Long story short; Edward supposedly found his mate and fell in love" she explained.

_So this was me she was talking about was it? But I couldn't have affected him so. He got bored of me so he left. Why should that bother any of them?_

"As she was only human," She continued, "naturally we had to leave her. It was my brother's decision in the end and to be honest with you I wasn't oppose to the idea. She was human. She had a life full of possibilities and opportunities ahead of her, but she was willing to throw it all away to become one of us, something which we have been damned to for eternity. Edward forced us to leave her but when we did he was devastated and hasn't been the same way ever since we left her all those years ago." _Oh, so it wasn't me she hated but simply my lack of respect for humanity. That makes sense._

"Anyway, he used to hide out in his room; brooding for months on end. But since we moved back here to Forks he's been disappearing, wondering around with no rhyme or reason. He won't tell any of us where he goes and Alice won't let on either, saying that he needs his privacy." _Why would he wonder off? Where would he go?_ My heart clenched at the idea that he may perhaps have found another girl. After all, he used to wonder off to go see me when I was human. _It wouldn't be would it?_

"If you ask me he needs to get his head back into reality. He's the one to make the choice to leave her so he has to accept his decision." Rosalie rambled out impatiently with no sympathy in her voice.

"Well then I'm confused. Why _did _you leave?" I puzzled. _This was a question that had been annoying me like crazy ever since he left. Was I finally about to get my answers..._

"We had our reasons." She said absently with a wave of her hand.

_No. Apparently I wasn't going to get my answers today or anytime soon._

"Getting back on topic – this is no reconciliation as I don't know you, so I still don't trust you yet. And no we won't be 'braiding each other's hair' any time soon, but I will ease off and _try_ to be nicer to you." Any hope that came from her words was crushed by her intimidating stare and short tone in her voice.

"After all I hope what Alice said comes true and you will be a good change for us all" she muttered quietly as if not wanting to truly admit to herself, never mind me.

Taken back by her optimism I decided to reassure her that I meant no harm. "Thank you Rosalie, I promise you that I am not here to hurt anyone of you".

Her eyes turned deadly harsh and I was taken aback. "You better not; cos if you do then I will make you regret the day you set foot in this measly town of Forks. And that's not a threat. It's a promise."

I was flabbergasted. She officially scared the hell out of me.

I gulped. What was I supposed to say to that?

"Fresh start?" She offered with her hand outstretched for me to shake in acceptance.

I took her hand in mine while nodding my head, "Sure". Unease was still the most dominant emotion controlling me after her _promise_.

"Good. Then let me officially introduce myself. Rosalie Cullen; has the tendencies to be a super bitch at time" she informed me with a humorous chuckle.

I couldn't control the giggle released from my lips as I responded. "Nice. I'm Renesmee Smith; unintentional intruder who means no harm".

"We'll see", she murmured under her breath. "Well now that _that _is out of the way, I'll leave you in peace. Don't take any resentment I have towards you personally". _How else am I supposed to take it?_

"It's fine. You have your reasons". _No matter how over dramatic they are. But then again – some things never change._

"I'll be around" she nodded. And with that she left.

**-:xoxo:-**

Debating with the idea of what to do next, I decided that reading just wouldn't suffice in distracting me enough from the Edward situation. So I closed my book and placed it in the bedside table drawer.

I eventually decided upon exploring the woods for a little while and maybe do a little hunting. It had been well over a week since my last hunt and the burn in the back of my throat was starting to become more prominent.

As I ventured out of the room and down the stairs I noticed that Esme was flittering about in the main living room, tidying around the already immaculate room.

She turned her head towards me as I descended the stairs at a slow human pace.

"Hello there dear. Are you alright?" She asked with genuine interest in her heart.

I smiled at her graciousness, touched by her concern. "I'm perfectly fine Esme. I was just going to go and explore the woods a little. Get my bearings and maybe hunt a little".

I could see that my words made her truly happy that I had finally accepted the Cullen's mansion as my temporary home.

"Would you like someone to accompany you? I could get Emmet or Jasper to -"

"No Esme. It's fine. I prefer a solitary walk. It gives me time to think." I interrupted. Her offer was too kind. "Besides, I'd hate to interrupt them in whatever they are doing".

"If you'd prefer, just don't go too far. And would it be too much to ask to be back before midnight to at least check in?" she wondered not wanting to sound rude.

"Of course Esme, I shan't be too long" I assured her not wanting her to panic and think that I had run off without so much as a goodbye. _And yes, the irony of that thought was not lost on me._

As I bounded out of the back door with impatient enthusiasm, I couldn't wait to let myself run at full vampire speed. The freedom of being awake and unstoppable was unimaginably blissful.

I raced across the lawn and sprang over the wide river which was the current obstacle in my way to the woods. With less effort than I would give to breathing I executed my landing with perfect grace on the other side of the river. My run did not falter as I made my way deeper into the forest, increasing my pace, stretching my legs as far as possible on every stride, pushing my speeds to limits that would have been unfathomable to any human eyes.

All of a sudden, I realised where I was headed off to. Unintentionally I had found my way to mine and Edwards's happy place – Our meadow.

The meadow was still as beautiful as ever. The untouched beauty made my heart swell at the recollection of the happier times spent here with my true love; the words of affection shown and spoken to one another, all now in the past.

I shook my head as I reminded myself to keep my attention of the present. On the small, perfectly round meadow filled with wildflowers – violet, yellow and soft white, the bubbling musical sound of the stream nearby.

As I closed my eyes to inhale the pleasant scents of the vegetation here, I stiffened as I picked up a foreign scent, one that didn't belong here, but one that I knew all too well. Even from weak human senses and memories.

As my eyes explored the meadow they focused in one the one thing that could possibly make this scene more enchanting and the beauty of the nature insignificant.

Here in this beautiful untouched serenity stood my angel.

* * *

**Oh - What a place to leave it!**

**That has to be the longest chapter I have written. **

**I think that deserves a review right?!**

**Thanks for the responses from the last chapter and my question. I will attempt to do both, but if I cannot then it will just be more frequent updates as then I have more determination to write.**

**You are all AMAZING!**

**Until next time - K, x**


	12. Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda's

**OMG. I was blown away by all of your reviews. I love each and everyone of you. I was ecstatically giddy when I saw that we had managed to reach over 100. W-O-W! **

**In reply to some - Yes I am a procrastinating, drama queen who loves a good cliff hanger as much as I hate them.**

**Finally the long awaited reunion is here and we gotsta see what Edward has to say for himself.**

**I know I have kept you waiting for too long for this chapter. So without further ado...**

* * *

**Previously...**

_ I shook my head as I reminded myself to keep my attention of the present. On the small, perfectly round meadow filled with wildflowers – violet, yellow and soft white, the bubbling musical sound of the stream nearby._

_As I closed my eyes to inhale the pleasant scents of the vegetation here, I stiffened as I picked up a foreign scent, one that didn't belong here, but one that I knew all too well. Even from weak human senses and memories._

_As my eyes explored the meadow they focused in one the one thing that could possibly make this scene more enchanting and the beauty of the nature insignificant._

_Here in this beautiful untouched serenity stood my angel._

**Chapter 12 - **** Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda's...**

Edward. My Edward.

My perfect Edward was stood there right before me. Not a hallucination – the real man himself, in the flesh.

Suddenly my surroundings ceased to exist.

My eyes traced over his pale white features: the hard square of his jaw, the softer curve of his full lips, the straight line of his nose, the top of his forehead – partially obscured by the tangle of rain-darkened bronze hair. My angel was as perfect as ever something my human eyes _clearly_ did not appreciate enough, but he looked sincerely troubled.

_Should I leave? I should leave! But I can't leave. Let's be honest; Edward Anthony Mason Cullen was stood just at the other side of the meadow. There was no way on hells earth I was leaving now, even if I was capable of doing so - which I wasn't._

As I attempted to approach as quietly as I could possible manage I knew my attempt was futile. Of course he would be able to tell that he wasn't alone. If he didn't see me, he could hear me. If not then he would definitely be able to pick up the new scent.

All of a sudden he turned to face me in a defensive crouch. I froze in my place un-wanting to seem hostile towards him and waited for his growl. Which didn't come – _Why not?_

Instead he just looked at me confused and tilted his head to the side like a bewildered puppy.

As his eyes were now focused towards me I noticed that they looked older than I had ever seen before; strained and tormented. Onyx black – he was clearly starving himself and in a lot of pain. The purple bruise-like shadows beneath his eyes were more prominent than I had ever seen on any other vampire in all of the years of my existence.

"Oh" I lamely said, prying myself to come out of my Edward-induced trance, suddenly realising that he wouldn't recognise me with my shield up. I was the perfect stranger to him and I can't honestly say that that realisation didn't tear me to pieces. I could easily show him my true self, but how would he react? _He _left _me_. Maybe he didn't want to see _Bella _ever again. I knew that I would never be _his Bella_ ever again – an awareness that took me decades to come to terms with. And it still hurt to think about.

Eventually, I decided to just play the Renesmee card. Maybe _Bella_ will never be his girlfriend again, but there was a possibility that _Renesmee_ could become his friend. That would simply have to suffice and I would just have to deal with it. _Or at least appear to accept it._

He was still there crouched looking at me with his expression looking ever more confused.

"I come in peace?" _Yeah Bella. Cos that doesn't make you sound like a lunatic! _My statement came out more like a question as I raised my hands in front of me showing that I meant no harm, mentally kicking myself for my stupidity.

He didn't reply. He just stood there staring at me. _Okay then..._

"Sorry, I'm Renesmee Smith. You're Edward Cullen right?" I questioned, already knowing the answer, offering my hand out for him to shake. Again he just stared. After a few more beats I withdrew my hand, hoping for this awkward moment of rejection and silence, on his side, to pass quickly.

"Erm... Are you OK?"

Just when I thought he wasn't going to reply again he surprised me "How do you know who I am?" he asked uncertainly.

_Crap Bella – Way to be subtle. How ya gonna get yourself out of this one?_

"Oh erm..." _THINK!_ "I... saw a photo of you? At your house, so I recognised you from that" _Smooth Bella - Real smooth!_

To this he just looked even more puzzled. So I decided to elaborate in a true Bella-rambling style.

"I'm new in town and Esme stumbled upon me and was courteous enough to offer to open up her home to me. I'm staying there for a little while, until I get my bearings" _or until I've become sane enough to leave with my heart intact._

He nodded absently not really absorbing the information, but straightening his posture anyway to show that he knew I wasn't an immediate danger to him.

"Don't worry. I'll stay out of your way", _well you could try but we all know that won't work!_ "I've been told that you are kind of a private person".

He scoffed, "Well that's one way to put it".

His eyes widened as if he suddenly realised that he had said too much.

That stumped me. "Well then how would you put it?" Annoyed at his attitude but still ever curious as to what he was going through, I attempted to be inquisitive without sounding too intrusive.

"Urm –nothing, never mind" he mumbled with an expressionless face, visibly backtracking.

_Clearly getting information from him about his life would be harder than getting blood out of a stone._

What had happened to him? He looked so broody. Rosalie's explanation for his behaviour just didn't seem enough to provoke such a reaction from him.

"So-"

"I can't hear your thoughts" he interrupted me immediately when I attempted to start a conversation.

"Pardon?" I knew what he had asked, but this was my attempt at stalling. _Crap. How could I forget that he couldn't read my mind? Would it give me away?_

"I'm a mind reader. That is my power. But I can't read yours..." he trailed off, staring at me intently.

"I'm a shield" I said defensively. "Mentally and physically, it comes in handy", I elaborated in a kinder tone. _Yeah, handy when you are trying to hide from your ex-boyfriend._

He raised his eye-brows in surprise. Finally - an actual response from him. "Wow. Impressive. I don't think I have ever come across a shield before." He mused.

"Well...now you have" I nodded, diverting my eyes to our surroundings. His intense gaze was stirring something in me which I can't say I disliked.

He was _impressed_ by _me_. Edward Cullen was impressed by Bella Swan – _well Renesmee Smith – _but still. I smiled internally at the fact that I could somehow be his equal. But reality came crashing down as I realised that would never be possible. I was still fundamentally Bella Swan, just wrapped in this beautiful, indestructible body with a pretty cool gift.

When I met his eyes again, he was still staring at me intently. I needed to divert his attention away from me to a safer topic. "So – why are you here?" _in our meadow, which we, Bella and Edward, shared._

He looked around as he drew out a long breath. "Shouldn't I be asking _you_ that?"

"I asked first" I said stubbornly. If he thinks I am gonna back down to his moody behaviour then he has another thing coming.

"I come here often. To think" He looked troubled.

"And to brood" I added without thought.

He smirked at me, clearly amused, but made no attempt to explain or correct me.

I wanted to smooth the crease that had etched itself between his brows with my finger. To run my hands across his stone hard face and trace his features. To allow my fingers to sweep into his messy disarray of hair, and then bring his head towards mine and softly press my lips to his with a soft yet passionate pressure.

_'I want' never gets Bella! So stop living in the land of fairytales and come back to reality._

Hmm. "To think? About what?" What could be troubling him so?

"Regrets. Mistakes. Woulda, coulda, shouda's." He let out an exasperated sigh. "I don't know why I am telling you all this. I don't tell anyone." He said shaking his head as if to find clarity.

"Trust me Edward; been there, done that, got the t-shirt and became the Mayor of all that crap."

I sat down next to him where he had situated himself on a fallen tree trunk at the edge of the meadow.

"So what's your excuse?" He challenged.

"It's a long story"

"I've got time" he quipped in reply.

"And I wouldn't want to waste a second of it by boring you with my tale"

"You wouldn't be – believe me. I find myself _intrigued_ by you"

_Intrigued? What was that supposed to mean? _Sighing in defeat, I gave him the short version - _the very short version._ "Long story short; I fell in love. And he broke my heart"

"And what about short story long?" he prompted trying to divulge more information from me.

Grr. Seriously – why could I never defy him something?

"I don't blame or resent him. He must have had his reasons, however deluded and far from the truth they were. I guess in the end it was unrequited love; weighing heavy on my side. I must have become too much of a burden for him to humour anymore."

There. That was enough. Not lying but not revealing the whole truth. He knew it all anyway, but just not that it was specifically me – Bella Swan or Renesmee Smith, whatever you wish to call me.

As I turned to face him, our eyes locked again.

"I find that hard to believe" he said in all seriousness as he stared into my soul.

The intensity was becoming too much again. "Well, what's done is done. We parted ways."

A few minutes of us both sat in companionable silent serenity, he spoke up quietly.

"You remind me of someone who I used to know" Edward mused mainly to himself.

"A good person or not?" He looked towards me as if only just realising I was there.

After a long while I thought he wasn't going to answer, so when it came it took me by surprise. "Oh the best I've ever known".

I was curious as to ask who, but I wasn't sure if I was going to like the answer.

The buzz of electricity that was evident in the atmosphere between us was not entirely lost on me. _Does he feel it too? Maybe I should leave now. This was all getting too much._

"Perhaps I should head back. I don't want Esme to think I have run away" I mused in an attempt to get out of this awkward situation.

Edward nodded in response.

"You should probably come too" I prompted not wanting to be too far away from him. _Great Bella – First day back and you are already as obsessed as ever_.

"They worry about you, you know. Even I, who have only known you all for a short while, can clearly see this. Even without your mind reading abilities".

He turned away from me.

"I suppose", he mumbled, but made no attempt to move.

After a few seconds passed, I started to grow impatient at his sullen attitude. "Well," I huffed, "I'm heading back. I made a promise to Esme and I plan to stick to it".

I turned to walk away but was stopped by an angelic voice."I'm coming", when he caught up to me he continued. "I don't mean to you know."

I turned to face him in confusion whilst continuing to move.

"Worry them, I mean" he amended when he realised that I didn't fully understand what he was trying to say. "I used to try to put on a show for them, but it was no use. I was miserable – still am. And being around them all of the time, hearing their thoughts, hearing what my pain was causing them; it just got too much. So I try to stay away for as long as possible – but not too far away to cause them, Esme especially, worry."

He clearly had no sense of clarity on what his decisions were causing his family. My sympathy really went out to Jasper. Having to go through all of this and feel everyone's pain.

"But can't you see Edward, you are just hurting them more, _especially Esme._"

I pulled him to a halt whilst talking a deep breath willing myself not to say something that I might regret. _C'mon Bella, don't get in too deep._

Maybe if I laid it all out how it was, clearly in front of his eyes, he would have no choice but to see what he was doing to his family and change.

"I've only known your family for a couple of hours and I can clearly see that your own self-destruction is causing their demise as well." I huffed impatiently.

He just stared at me. His face expressionless, until finally, "I know", he sighed dejectedly, looking down at his shoes, hanging his head in shame.

As I shook my head, I knew my next words would be my breaking but his reckoning if I could get through to him.

"Can't you just move on, from whatever had caused you this?"

"MOVE ON?!" He roared incredulously. "How could anyone, you especially, expect me to move on?" he continued getting louder as he went on. "I lost my mate. The only person of whom I could ever truly fall in love with"

"Technically _you_ left _her_" I mumbled under my breath.

Suddenly he was in front of my face, panting in fast shallow breaths, with a deathly glare on his face. He had never looked more frightfully menacing._ And boy did he look sexy! NOT THE TIME BELLA!_

"You don't know _anything_" He said in a lethally quiet tone that sent shivers down my spine.

Showing no defeat, I retorted in a blasé attitude. "Perhaps not. But what I do know is that she wouldn't want you neglecting your family like this. Would she?"

He stepped back away from me in defeat. This in itself was an answer enough.

"I thought not".

He stared back at me with an unreadable emotion in his gorgeous darkened topaz eyes.

"Now then – What are you gonna do about it?" I challenged him, raising an eyebrow.

He continued to stare at me a beat longer, and then turned to continue to walk back towards the house.

I followed in his direction, a couple of steps behind him allowing him to lead the way. Also taking full advantage of the splendid view I now had._ Shameless ogling Bella! Tut tut._

* * *

**Kay, I know some of you wanted Bella to come right out and say who she was and I know that some will be annoyed with me and believe that Edward would automatically know that this was Bella due to not being able to read her mind and being familiar with her scent. But lets just believe that he is blinded by his broodiness. **

**To treat y'all for the reviews, I left the end of the chapter in a kinder manner with practically no suspense. I did that - for you! Your welcome. xx**

**Would people like personal replies to reviews? Cos I can do that if you want. When I read a FanFic it really doesn't bother me if the author does this or not, but I want you all to know how appreciated you are.**

**Please review if you have a spare minute. Keep me in the know as to what you are thinking.**

**I think we all know that you are AWESOME. **

**Until next time - K, x**


	13. Utmost Sincerity

**I know you hate me. Not that any of you really care for my excuses but my work schedule has been crazy and coursework deadlines have been looming as of late. Both of which has managed to make me physically sick. Also I was in Berlin, Germany for a while in February so that delayed things. And then my cat was really ill so I took him to the vets - turned out he had cancer and had to be put down. Life's a bitch! I haven't been dealing with it all very well.**

**Anyway. Sorry. **

**I promise that I will NEVER give up on this story until it has come to an end. **

**With my groveling out of the way, it is time to see what the Cullen's have in store for Bella.**

**See ya at the bottom...**

* * *

**Previously...**

_"Now then – What are you gonna do about it?" I challenged him, raising an eyebrow._

_He continued to stare at me a beat longer, and then turned to continue to walk back towards the house._

_I followed in his direction, a couple of steps behind him allowing him to lead the way. Also taking full advantage of the splendid view I now had. _Shameless ogling Bella! Tut tut.

**Chapter 13**** - Utmost Sincerity...**

"After you" Edward motioned to the front door when we finally reached the house.

"Why thank you", I replied. _See – my chivalrous Edward is still in there somewhere._

As I walked into the house with Edward following closely behind my attention was immediately drawn to all of the Cullen's, now including Carlisle, huddled together at the bottom of the staircase. All six of them immediately stopped talking as we walked in – clearly I was the topic of conversation. Not that I was too bothered. Of course they would be talking about the complete stranger who had now invaded their home – even if it was politely offered by the host.

Their focus was now on me; shock written across their faces as they registered that Edward was there as well.

"I see you met Edward then" Alice chirped, saving the rest of them from responding, allowing them to stand there gaping like fishes.

"Yeah – Sort of"

Esme was smiling at me with a gleeful expression.

I stood there awkwardly debating whether or not to just plainly introduce myself to Carlisle just to distract everyone else.

Carlisle quickly saw my discomfort from all of this attention and took matters into his own hands.

"Renesmee, I presume. I'm Carlisle" he said offering me his hand. "Welcome to our home", polite as ever.

He looked just like a movie star – yes that's what Charlie first described as to me. And that assessment was still as accurate as ever.

His well-toned medium frame carried him across the room with grace and elegance, his gentle eyes were caring and compassionate, and his beautiful, collar-length blonde hair handsomely framed his face. His 6'2" height could have easily intimidated my small stature, but with the loving and compassionate vibe from which I always received from Carlisle made it impossible to feel that way.

_That_ and Jaspers calming ambiance.

"Thank you, Carlisle" I replied with utmost sincerity.

Seeing them all together like this once again made me want to cry. I was actually with them again. And they had accepted me – albeit temporarily and not as my true self. _Yeah, I was starting to see some flaws in my not at all thought out plan._

I wish I had the courage to tell them the truth right then. Say 'I am Bella, hear me roar', or something which would probably be more acceptable. But I am, and will always be, a coward. And more prudently, I didn't want to be rejected. Not again. Looking at all of their collective beautiful faces in the room, I knew that I couldn't possibly survive without them again. Not truly.

How I ever did that in the first place was only in hope that I would see them once more.

"Alice." Edward broke me out of my thoughts by a low warning growl.

She was working her way towards me but turned towards Edward at his interruption.

"Now, now Edward. It's nice to see you getting all pally with someone else for a change but, Renesmee" she called, turning to face me. "I've got one word for you" she said in all seriousness.

_What could it possibly be? Had she found out who I was – no that was impossible. She wouldn't have been able to see it because I haven't of planned to tell anyone. _

_Is she upset that I'm talking to Edward? That can't be it either. She just said that it was nice to see us getting 'pally'. _

"What?" I said, with concern and worry seeping into my voice.

"SHOPPING!" she half-screeched, half sang.

_Way to go Bella – what a total mental freak-out! _I sighed in relief, relaxing my posture, until the realisation of her words sank in.

Shopping – _Urghh._

As she started dragging me out of the house, I pulled her to a stop. "Shopping? For what?"

"For school, of course" She said by way of an explanation. As if this would be the only possible answer and I was an imbecile not to have understood right away.

"But Alice, I haven't -" I started. But my attempt to protest was futile as she began to drag me out of the house again and towards the garage.

"Don't worry Renesmee" she interrupted, "I do not see you leaving us anytime soon. So, until you do, you will be coming to school with us. And for that you will need an entire new wardrobe. You can't be seen walking around in those straggly clothes all term" she rambled.

"Alice." Esme hushed disapprovingly.

She stopped all of a sudden, halting the following six in their path, and looked at me. "No offense", she amended.

"None taken" I replied.

I couldn't even remember the last time I went shopping. I only really went these last sixty years when I was in real desperate need for something – which wasn't often. I couldn't say that I particularly enjoyed it either. But I would willingly humour her and go if it made Alice happy - which evidently it did.

I had no need for fashion. Who did I need to impress? Looking down at my clothes, although I wasn't offended, I couldn't help but feel a little insecure standing among the Cullen's. It wasn't that my clothes were dirty, because they weren't. Unlike Alice – I was aware of such a thing called a washing machine. But their clothes were so trendy and _clearly_ very expensive.

Mine, although not very old, paled greatly in comparison.

"Well then Renesmee. We will have to get to know each other better once you return". Carlisle offered whilst Alice was ushering me into the car.

"That sounds great – I look forward to it!" _And I really was looking forward to getting to know him again. Talking to him again, all of them, was like a breath of fresh air of which I was in desperate need of._

When I was finally seated and Alice began to make her way to her side of her Porsche, an angelic voice ran right to my ears.

"Don't let her bully you" Edward whispered to me just before we left.

* * *

**Aww, Edward is so sweet!**

**Well there had to be an Alice shopping chapter in soonish. I feel that she could possibly spill some gossip about Edward for us. We'd like that wouldn't we?!**

**I specifically dedicate this chapter to justme98 and the guest reviewers who I unintentionally tormented. Sorry.**

**Love always. **

******Until next time - K, x**


	14. My Lucky Day

**After returning from Paris and divulging into multiple Mobward stories, neither of which are connected in any way at all, I was struck with inspiration again. Well... Kinda.**

**Will you please forgive my lack of updates? I doubt that I am any good at all at this and when I do that I begin to lose interest in my story. Hence neglecting my wonderful readers - if there are any of you left and still bothering with this.**

**Anyway, I do not own Twilight. If I did then I would certainly not doubt my abilities and would finish writing and publish _Midnight Sun_. Then I'd be awesome!**

* * *

**Previously...**

_When I was finally seated and Alice began to make her way to her side of her Porsche, an angelic voice ran right to my ears._

_"Don't let her bully you" Edward whispered to me just before we left._

**Chapter 14 - ****My Lucky Day...**

"Oh hush! Don't listen to his nonsense. He's just jealous that I get to play with you and he doesn't." She remarked, sticking her tongue out at him like a three year old.

With that, she slammed on the gas pedal and we were out of the garage quicker than I could formulate a response.

-:xoxo:-

The ride to Seattle certainly wasn't quiet.

When we hit the man roads Alice didn't hesitate to turn on the radio to full blast when she had finally settled on a station she liked, '_Oldies FM'_. A familiar song began to play out of the speakers and Alice started singing along – _more like screeching_.

_" He was a boy, She was a girl, Can I make it any more obvious?_

_He was a punk. She did ballet. What more can I say? " _She wailed, her voice an octave higher than the melody, weaving through it with a complicated harmony.

I sat there chuckling at her, shaking my head. How was she always so chipper?

"Aww c'mon Renesmee, sing along too!" she whined.

When I shook my head at her she simply pouted.

"Humour me." _Wasn't_ _humouring her with this shopping trip enough?_

She jutted her bottom lip out and stared at me with wide, sad eyes. _Apparently not._ Clearly she was going to guilt me into doing things her way.

_Urghh. The things I would do for this family._

Her demeanour immediately changed as I began to belt the song along with her to the chorus.

_" He was a skater boy, she said, 'See ya later, boy.'_

_He wasn't good enough for her._

_She had a pretty face but her head was up in space._

_She needed to come back down to earth. "_

We laughed and sang the whole way to Seattle, which wasn't all that long in actuality with the way Alice drove.

As we pulled into the car park we couldn't stop giggling.

Alice led me out of the car and into the mall.

The size of the place and the amount of shops here was astounding. Floor upon floor of designer labels. Ted Baker, Michael Kors, Abercrombie & Fitch...

"Oh my God" I mumbled. Staring wide eyed at all of the shops. If we went to even half of these shops, and knowing Alice – we would visit the majority, then it would take hours. Possibly days!

"It's no Louis Vuitton or Gucci, but it will do." She stated. "For today, at least" She amended, seeming satisfied.

"Of course if we had more time I would have taken us both to Pairs. The Galeries Lafayette there has the most _divine_ collections. But of course we can save that for another day." She began to ramble as she pulled me into the direction of the first torture chamber, whatever shop that may be.

"Baby steps. It all requires baby steps." She digressed. "Don't worry Nessie – stick with me and you will be my greatest fashionista project ever!"

I pulled her to a stop. "Nessie?" I questioned. _Was that supposed to be me_?

"Oh, I hope that's okay. It's just that Renesmee is pretty and all, but it can be a bit of a mouthful. You don't mind do you?"

_Erm..._ "No. Of course not" I smiled. After all, every girl wished to be nicknamed after the Loch Ness Monster!

_My Lucky day._

* * *

**A little bit of fluff. (Don't hate me for the lack of action.)**

**Love always.**

**Until next time - K, x**


	15. Self-Righteous Beliefs

**Hey there. Thanks for your continued support. **

**I loved your reviews. x**

**Some of you really didn't like the last chapter and were disappointed in me. So I'm sorry.**

**There are many fanfics out there which are much better than mine and I**** would be happy to give recommendations if anyone wants something amazing to read.**

**Right, so lets get on with the story...**

* * *

**Previously****...**

_"Baby steps. It all requires baby steps." She digressed. "Don't worry Nessie – stick with me and you will be my greatest fashionista project ever!"_

_I pulled her to a stop. "Nessie?" I questioned. _Was that supposed to be me?

_"Oh, I hope that's okay. It's just that Renesmee is pretty and all, but it can be a bit of a mouthful. You don't mind do you?"_

Erm_... "No. Of course not" I smiled. After all, every girl wished to be nicknamed after the Loch Ness Monster!_

My Lucky day.

**Chapter 15**- **Self-Righteous Beliefs...**

"Here. Try this on as well while you're in there." Alice shouted even though it wasn't really necessary.

I was currently trapped in a dressing room with Alice barking orders and throwing clothes at me.

It had been this way for hours; Alice throwing me into a dressing room as soon as we entered a shop and throwing a heap full of clothes at me to try on.

And I'd comply like a good little girl.

You'd think that with immortality would come patience and therefore tolerance for inconsequential tasks, such as shopping. But that is SO not true.

At least when I went shopping as a human there would be breaks in the day for refreshments or to relax, as I was a _weak_ and _tired_ human. Then I had excuses. But now I was supposed to endure it without complaint.

And it had started that way at first. But as time ticked on, my complaints and grumbles became more frequent.

"Alice!" I whined. "No more. Pleeaasssee."

I was mentally tired. I'd had enough for one day. This whole meeting the Cullen's again was emotionally exhausting and I needed some _me _time. Some time to think about what in God's name I was planning on doing. I'd lied to the Cullen's about who I was, and they were buying it.

How long would the lie last? Could they really not tell that I was in fact Bella? What if they find out? How would they react? How should I react?

So many questions that I needed to figure out.

But I couldn't possibly think with this pixie ordering me around the mall.

It wasn't that I was not grateful for what she was doing for me, because I was. And I was glad to be spending time with my best friend again. But I had forgotten how relentless she was. _Especially_ when it came to shopping.

At the end of the day, I couldn't care less about what people thought about my appearance. However, for some reason, making people pretty made Alice happy. And I was willing to suffer a little to make Alice happy. Maybe if I complied with her wishes then she would tolerate me for longer. _One could only hope_.

"I know Nessie, I know. But this is the last store for today. I swear." Alice said in a contrite tone.

She had clearly sensed that I had begun to have enough. In the last few stores she seemed to have given me fewer items to try on.

As I emerged from the stall in a pastel blouse and skinny fitted jeans, Alice gushed over how attractive I looked. _Yeah right_.

"You look amazing Ness. Your figure just seems to suit everything I pick out for you. You can pull of that gorgeous yet subtle look effortlessly. You are going to wow the students at Forks High."

"Erm, Alice. I'm really not all that fond of drawing attention to myself. I should probably just wear jeans, sneakers and a hoodie." I mumbled looking down at my feet. "I'll already be that freak that's starting half way through the year. It is going to be annoying enough as it is."

"Nessie," she began. "You can't help being pretty. It is clear to see that you were gifted with your looks before you were a vampire and I'm not going to let you hide your natural beauty."

A mischievous grin suddenly took over her face, "If anything, I'm going to show you how to _enhance_ it properly."

"Alice" I said low and warningly. I didn't need to be made more of a freak-show than I already was.

"Oh, there's no need to thank me Renesmee. You've made my year by just going shopping with me."

How could I be angry and argue with _that_?

"It has been nice having a girlfriend to shop with again. Since... well, since certain events transpired, shopping hasn't been the same. But when you came along – I don't know, it just felt right." She explained diffidently.

I walked over to where she perched on a chair in the corner of the dressing room and hugged her shoulders.

"Alice..." I was hesitant to ask, but I had to know. "What happened?"

She audibly exhaled. "It's not really my story to tell." _So everybody keeps saying!_

"Oh. Okay" I said reluctantly, forcing a smile.

"But if you are to be staying with us, you should probably know the most of it."

She clearly wanted to say more. Tell me the whole story of what had happened, but just didn't want to upset anyone's feelings.

"Are you sure Alice?" I really did not want to trouble her, or anyone else for that matter. "I really don't want to pry."

No matter how badly I wanted to know and understand what had happened to the Cullen's to sadden them so, I just couldn't stick my nose in where it didn't belong.

_This couldn't have anything to do with me could it? Rosalie mentioned that they hadn't been the same since they left me 62 years ago. But it couldn't possibly have affected Alice too, could it? _

_It just didn't make sense. _

_I felt vain for even entertaining the idea._

_There had to be another factor that I was missing. Why would they way they were all acting be centred around leaving me; plain old Bella? Edward had said himself that I was no good for him and he didn't want me anymore._

_And he left, leaving no trace of him behind._

My head started to pound as I tried to focus on the facts. But nothing seemed clear or logical.

"Urghh" She heaved. She was clearly tired and frustrated with whatever was bothering her. "It's all Edwards fault really. Him and his self-righteous beliefs, thinking that he knows best, when really he doesn't. Sixty years of suffering is clear proof of that. _He_ left _her_. And I told him over and over again that this was stupid. But Carlisle was all 'It's _Edward decision, he will do what he thinks is best_.'" Alice mimicked Carlisle's voice. When she started her rant, she sprang up and was now frantically pacing the small dressing room.

"I mean, he's my brother and all, and I love him. But sometimes he is just so goddamned stupid; especially then and defiantly now. He made his decision.

"And it's not as if we are allowed to talk about it at the house, because _God forbid_ that Edward hears and will get upset. Seriously, if he even hears us thinking about _her_ then he throws a complete temper tantrum." She fumed.

Erm. Wait. WHAT?!

This was about me wasn't it?

_Well this is defiantly gonna complicate things more._

"Wait, Alice. Is this about m- err...Bella?"

"Yeah." She droned, as if I was an imbecile for even asking that, slumping back down in the seat. She looked tired as she rubbed her temples. After a few minutes her head snapped up to look at me. "Wait. How did you know her name?" she questioned me suspiciously, when she seemed to come back to her senses.

Crap Bella. Way to slip up again.

"R-Rosalie. She mentioned a little something earlier." I stuttered. "Nothing in great detail though". I added to sound confident.

She seemed to stare at me for a few moments before a relax smile seemed to spread across her face. She stood up and walked towards me, shaking her head dismissively.

"Anyway, enough talk about this lets go home."

Those words were music to my ears.

Alice grabbed the clothes which she just had me try on and went to the cash register. For the seventh time today she bought and paid for all of the clothes and for the seventh time today I had protested against her for doing so.

But arguing against Alice was futile. She simply wouldn't let me pay for a thing. She said that because it was her idea to come and she had decided on what to buy for me that it was her responsibility to pay. I argued that she was being ridiculous and she simply said that the same could be said about me. _Whatever that was supposed to mean._

-:xoxo:-

When we arrived back at the house it was past midnight. Alice didn't rush to drive us home, seeming to enjoy my company. We kept a light conversation, talking about ourselves. Every time the topic centred on me I would answer vaguely and try to distract her with something else.

Alice hadn't been up to much at all these last sixty years. She mentioned that she had been drawing sketches to possibly start her own fashion line, even if it was just low-key, but she simply lacked the motivation to see it through properly.

I would defiantly make sure to change that. I couldn't have them all brooding around just existing instead of living. It wasn't right.

When we got inside, Alice was straight on me again to play make-over with her. "So, your hair; don't get me wrong – I think it's beautiful just the way it is and doesn't need a cut or any altering, but maybe just a little styling. What do you think?"

She was seriously asking my opinion? The most I could be bothered to do with my hair was wash it and brush it.

"That's fine Alice. Do what you think is best".

"Or you could just let her breathe for a while and stop suffocating her" a velvety voice chimed.

Alice froze for a moment, eyes wide, staring at her brother as he made his way down the stairs. When she came to her senses, a slow smile came across her face. She looked like the weight of the world had been finally lifted off her shoulders.

She was quick to reply, "It's not suffocating. We just went for some _innocent_ shopping and -"

"_Innocent shopping_?" Edward interrupted with a beautiful clear bark of laughter. "More like _kidnapping_." He teased. Seeing Edward like this still weighed heavy on my chest. His mocking was lighthearted but still seemed guarded. Like he wasn't allowed to laugh and have fun.

But at least he wasn't moping around by himself, like everyone else said he usually did.

"Hmpf. It was not kidnapping if she went willingly" she attempted to sulk, crossing her arms over her chest. However it was clear to see that it was playfully done so.

"It is if she doesn't have full knowledge of what she is getting herself into" he quipped.

"Whatever, Edward. As promised I returned her in one piece. Just more fashionably styled. Or at least she will be after I've finished her beautifying process."

"She's already beautiful" Edward defended me, shocking us all. The words blurted out like he didn't mean to say them. Although I was embarrassed from his unintentional flattery, I refused to look away from him. When he realised what he had said, his eyes widened in shock and he took a step back away from us. "Anyway, I s-should be g-getting going" he hedged, stumbling out the door like he couldn't get away from me any quicker, avoiding eye-contact with me whilst doing so.

Alice sighed in defeat once he had left.

"Where's he going?"I pondered. I had hardly spent any time with him yet. He seemed to be always trying to get away from me.

"He's running away to his hiding spot." Noticing the frown on my face she elaborated. "To be honest with you, he's spoken more with us today than he has all month. It's really strange. He's usually never around and when he is he is not sociable at all." She dismissed, the sadness creeping over her face again.

Jasper was instantly down and by her side, pecking her on the lips. Her mood instantly lifted as she stared into his eyes.

"Had fun?" Jasper inquired, cuddling up with Alice.

"Always" she replied, leaning into his embrace. "The bags are in the car. Would you mind getting them for us?" She asked Jasper with a puppy dog look on her face.

Jasper didn't answer verbally. He simply kissed her cheek in response and made his way towards the garage.

I stood gaping at her, shaking my head in disbelief.

"I could have got them for us", I felt guilty for making Jasper do it. I didn't want it to seem like I expected things to be done for me automatically. I wouldn't have someone doing my bidding on command.

"Never mind, it's done now. How about we go start on your hair?" Alice chirped, looking for a distraction.

"Actually, would you mind if I took a rain-check? I just feel like relaxing and reading for a while. Prep myself mentally for school."

"Oh, okay. That's fine. I'll go play with Jaz." She started to dance away. "School tomorrow is going to be so fun! Night Nessie."

_Yeah – about as fun as poking myself in the eye. _"Goodnight Alice."

I made my way straight to the room I had been designated, only stopping to say hello to Esme and Carlisle for a few minutes. As they sat together on the loveseat in the living room, I tried not to take up too much of their time as I felt like I was interrupting their privacy.

When I got there, I collapsed on the bed. Throwing off my shoes, I settled comfortably on the bed and pulled out my book.

My escapism from reading couldn't come soon enough. It was times like these when I wished that I could have drifted off into a dreamful sleep where I could truly escape my problems.

_What was I gonna do? Now that I was here and back into their lives – what was my plan?_

One thing was for sure was that I couldn't tell them who I truly was. Telling them that I was Bella Swan would ruin everything.

They'd hate me again and I'd be back to square one.

* * *

**How was that?**

**Still hate me?**

**It might not have been all that good, but it was longer right. That has got to give me brownie points or something. **

**Mmmmm... brownies.**

**Leave me a review so I know how your brain-box is working.**

**Until next time - K, x**


	16. Questionable Morals

**I do not own The Twilight Saga. **

**I wish I did.**

* * *

**Previously...**

_I made my way straight to the room I had been designated, only stopping to say hello to Esme and Carlisle for a few minutes. As they sat together on the loveseat in the living room, I tried not to take up too much of their time as I felt like I was interrupting their privacy._

_When I got there, I collapsed on the bed. Throwing off my shoes, I settled comfortably on the bed and pulled out my book._

_My escapism from reading couldn't come soon enough. It was times like these when I wished that I could have drifted off into a dreamful sleep where I could truly escape my problems._

What was I gonna do? Now that I was here and back into their lives – what was my plan?

_One thing was for sure was that I couldn't tell them who I truly was. Telling them that I was Bella Swan would ruin everything._

_They'd hate me again and I'd be back to square one._

**Chapter 16 - Questionable Morals...**

The day that I had been dreading all evening had finally arrived; Monday morning – AKA school time.

It was days like these when I truly under stood why Garfield hated Mondays. Although his vendetta against them was different to mine; he didn't have to endure the purgatory that was a teenage high school.

Alice didn't let me rest in solitude for long. She had me in her room prodding me with various make-up brushes and hair stylers for well over an hour.

After spending all morning being primped and prepped by Alice, with her also deciding what I was to wear, I was finally deemed worthy of gracing the school with my presence. Even though my vampire abilities made my appearance flawless Alice had still managed to find plenty of room for improvement. "It's just polishing off perfection" she would mutter every time she saw I was about to complain. _She really needed to learn some new lines._

When she was finished I trudged down the stairs and let Alice get ready by herself. Jasper was already down there reading some kind of history book, occasionally tutting away to himself.

"The amount of inaccuracy there is in these books astonishes me", he muttered to me, shaking his head as he looked at the book. He closed it shut, threw it off to the side and looked at me.

"You know, you really don't have to go if you're dreading it," mumbled Jasper as quietly as possible whilst still being audible to me and myself only. No doubt so his wife wouldn't catch him. I had to chuckle at that; facing the wrath of Alice was something everyone tried to avoid.

"No, it's fine. I do have to go. I promised Alice I would. I just hate attracting attention and all that hoopla. And let's face it; in a town _this _small I am bound to be noticed whether I like it or not. Anyway it gets me out of the house." I said with determination.

"Yeah, there is no use hiding at home like Edward" he remarked loudly clearly intending the man of topic would hear.

I had to chuckle at Jasper's antics. I had heard him in hours earlier trying to persuade him to come to school with us once he had returned back to the house. Edward and I hadn't spoken since the night previous. It was like he was trying to be purposefully distant with me, _which hurt like hell._ I tried not to let it get to me but to be honest – it did.

"No. I won't be a coward" I said still determined as ever. "Unlike some", I added more quietly. It was clear as to whom I was talking about.

Jasper smirked at my Edward comment and leaned in closer to me, "You sure?"

"JASPER", Alice screeched from the top of the staircase, interrupting my response. "I hope you are not talking Renesmee out of going to school with us" Alice challenged as she descended the stairs quickly and gracefully.

"No. Of course not my love" he rectified, immediately rushing over to place a delicate kiss on his wife's lips. _Kiss ass._

Alice raised an eye-brow, not giving in to his puppy-dog look. She clearly wasn't buying this.

"It was quite the opposite – I assure you" I assisted Jasper and he threw me a grateful look.

Her frown was suddenly resolved and was replaced with excitement as she clapped her hands together and began bouncing up and down. "Come on then. Let's get going", and with that she was out of the house.

I stood where I was, still laughing at the blur that just left.

"Well, you heard the boss. Let's go." Jasper chuckled.

-:xoxo:-

Much to Rosalie's dismay, still not really taking a liking to me, we all squished in to one car for the ride to school.

Once we arrived and were out of the car, the focus of all of the students in the car park was on the new girl with the strange Cullen's. Or in other words; me. _Great..._

"Looks like someone is the new focus of attention." Emmet joked, nudging me slightly.

The students were gathered in there cliques quietly mumbling to each other. Pointing and looking in our direction.

"Don't get used to it" Rosalie mumbled and attempted to pull Emmet away. He gave her a stern warning look and she backed down. "Or do – whatever." She amended. Then she dragged Emmet off elsewhere with him shouting "See you guys later", leaving me, Alice and Jasper still stood by the car.

Jasper and Alice took me to the office to get my papers signed in and my class timetable. Alice was making idle chitchat with the receptionist about how I was a distant relative of her adoptive parents and I was staying with them indefinitely.

I looked over the papers with relief as I noted that the classes didn't seem too bad. Of course, they wouldn't be hard necessarily, just mind numbingly boring. I had history first which wasn't too bad. When they got the facts right I did find it interesting. I just hoped that it would be interesting enough to draw my classmate's attention away from me and on the subject topic.

Something told me that it wouldn't be _that_ interesting.

We left the office and Alice went off in her own direction, having mathematics first. Jasper was walking me to history, luckily sharing that class with me.

After a while of silence I turned to him, "Jasper, why are you so nice to me?"

He gave me a puzzled look of confusion and said "I'm _sorry?_ Do you want me to be unpleasant?"

He misunderstood entirely as to what I was getting at so I elaborated. "I mean; the others are polite enough towards me, but they are still quite hesitant towards me, apart from Alice of course. And I was just wondering why that was."

"That's simple; they don't trust you yet." He casually commented as if it was common knowledge and I shouldn't have been affected by it. Of course the Cullen's wouldn't trust me. I had to remember that they weren't seeing _Bella_. But who's to say they would trust me even if they knew my true identity.

"And you do?"

"Well, Alice trusts you, and that is good enough for me. She is not usually wrong about this type of thing. The others are just worried, especially since you have had a great effect on Edward." Sensing my confusion, he clarified more clearly. "You don't see it Ness – the effect you have already had on us; all of us. Edward and Alice especially. She said you would be good for us and I can already feel it."

I was going to ask him what he precisely meant by that but I was interrupted by the bell.

"Saved by the bell." Jasper joked.

When we entered the classroom, the majority of the students were in their seats already. Jasper pushed me towards the teacher's desk and then went to go find his seat.

The man hunched behind the desk looked to be in his early fifties. The tell tale sign of his hair that was clearly once auburn and was now heavily highlighted with silver streaks, showed the years of stress that this job had given him. His thickly framed glasses were balanced on the tip of his nose as he peered down through them, deeply concentrating on the papers he was attempting to read as he waited for his class to fill the room.

I cleared my throat in an attempt to capture the teacher's attention. He looked up at me and smiled encouragingly towards me whilst setting his papers aside.

"Hello there," the elderly gentleman, Mr. Hall said politely. "You must be ...Renesmee Smith" he said with a quick glance down at a small piece of paper.

"That's me", I replied in confirmation.

"Well, Miss Smith, welcome to AP History. Looking at your past records I'm sure that you will fit right in with this advanced class." He commented as he came to the front of the desk to stand right beside me.

Alice had managed to work really fast on getting my 'past records' together. She made me look like a frigging genius.

Turning to face the class, we simultaneously noticed that I was the focus of attention of everyone in the room. This would have been amusing considering his previous comment, if it hadn't have been so awkward. _Yeah, I'm gonna stick out like a sore thumb._

"Unfortunately for you it is assigned seating." _Not that I really know many people to want to sit next to anyway._

I looked to Jasper who was already seated next to a dorky looking teenage boy, second row back, with short hair and glasses, who wouldn't stop gaping at me. Kindly, observing my unease, he sent me waves of calm and I smiled greatly in his direction.

Mr. Hall directed me towards a seat towards the back of the classroom, next to a girl who didn't seem too pleased to have me as her new seating partner. I attempted to give her a friendly smile but she simply rolled her eyes, stuck her nose in the air and turned her head to face away from me.

I found out that her name was Theresa Newton. Later in the day I asked Alice what her deal was and she was not shy in spilling all of her family drama. Apparently, from the gossip source that is Alice, she was a descendant of Mike Newton. Mike married Jessica Stanley in the end, the whole 'childhood sweethearts' story was their angle. She got pregnant right out of high school and married her baby-daddy. Due to the financial cost of the child, Mike had to drop out of college and ended up working full time in his father's shop, of which he eventually took over and ran right into the ground. Safe to say; their marriage was one of questionable morals. By the first month, with his pent up aversion to her for 'ruining his life', he was cheating on her. By the second, her hatred for him and what the baby had done to her body had won out and she had taken his hush money and legged it with the kid. As the third month came around, she came crawling back to him, already broke and in desperate need for cash. The next time she saw him cheat, she just kept quiet and got a bit on the side of her own.

Basically these morals were passed down to Theresa. Alice explained that she saw me as a threat and that I would just have to accept that there was no pleasing some people.

For the rest of the day, people were still distant and gossiping about me behind my back, but at least they were civilised to my face.

_Day one down – the only way is up, right?_

* * *

**Thank you for your reviews.**

**You are all still awesome!**

******Until next time - K, x**


End file.
